So I was in Walmart last week, waiting to checkout on a particularly crowded evening. It occurred to me to wonder whether anyone in the crowd was telepathic (who among us hasn't thought about that one, at least once....right?). I then started wondering how I could possibly tell even if someone around me could in fact read my mind. So I did the only thing to be done, under the circumstances. I deliberately thought "I know you can hear me" very loudly (so to speak) and immediately started intently examining the faces of the people around me. This drew some confused and awkwardly shifting gazes (particularly from the two ladies standing right behind me), but I concluded these to be more a reaction to being suddenly owlishly scrutinized by a dumpy little stranger than proof of thought-reception. Though disappointed it dawned on me that, if someone could in fact hear what I was thinking, they wouldn't fall for the whole I-know-your-secret trick because they'd mind-read a bright red Admiral Ackbar warning right alongside it (it's a trap)! Now this was a real quandary and kept me occupied through most of checking out (I must confess I shockingly ignored the very enthusiastic high school senior manning the counter. Sorry, high school senior). As I was paying up, I realized there's no real way around that caveat so I decided to make one last attempt and leave. So I thought (deafeningly, just in case) "CAN YOU HEAR ME?" and scanned my surroundings.
Right then, I saw this 8 year old (or thereabouts) little girl turn to look right at me.
RIGHT. AT. ME.
And she nodded.
For the space of about 1 second, I felt an overwhelming mixture of disbelief, excitement, guilt (gosh knows what other thoughts I inflicted on that poor child), and a bunch of micro-feelings that are impossible to name. A real live telepath???
Nope. Of course not.
Turns out, the little lady was nodding acquiescence to some request from her mother who was standing some ways behind me. This sad, but also much more believable, truth brought on another barrage of pesky feelings. Mostly embarrassment (accompanied, of course, by an inevitable reddening of cheeks because why shouldn’t my vascular system make things worse when it can?).
It is forgivable, I think, this entertaining of a totally nonsensical notion with some seriousness (or total conviction) for a brief moment in time. Even scientists and academicians and researchers are allowed their own pet fantasy and science fiction hopes and dreams after all, even if they will almost certainly never be reality.
Plus, Walmart was clearly the wrong place to try this. Even telepaths should be allowed to navigate that treacherous quagmire in peace.
